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RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

Shortage of Tonic Water 

I mean...seriously? WTF???

When my butler told me this morning that he checked all over town and couldn’t find any I was so upset I threw my Martini across the lawn and kicked the damned lounger into the pool. Everyone knows breakfast = G&T!! This is a FREAKING CATASTROPHE!!!






(So.....do I get the part? I’ve been watching Netflix a lot recently...I think I’ve got a pretty good idea of what people want.)
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 27 2020 22:04:37
 
BarkellWH

Posts: 3146
Joined: Jul. 12 2009
From: Washington, DC

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

I can understand your displeasure at the blighter, kicking him into the pool. As a retired member of the British regiment known as the Khyber Rifles who has seen action on the Khyber Pass and the Northwest Frontier, I brought back with me in retirement my batman who had served me so well while engaged in action on the Frontier. He would certainly know where to obtain tonic water, and I would be obliged to put him in touch with your butler.

William H. Barkell, Esq., Regimental Commander (Ret.)

_____________________________

And the end of the fight is a tombstone white,
With the name of the late deceased,
And the epitaph drear, "A fool lies here,
Who tried to hustle the East."

--Rudyard Kipling
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 27 2020 22:24:52
 
Pgh_flamenco

 

Posts: 1343
Joined: Dec. 5 2007
From: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

People probably want tonic water that has Quinine in it even though it’s not the same as hydroxychloroquine.

_____________________________

  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 27 2020 22:46:08
 
RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to BarkellWH

quote:

He would certainly know where to obtain tonic water, and I would be obliged to put him in touch with your butler.

Why, thank you, Bill.

Good butlers are so hard to come by these days that I would never dare to abuse the dear fellow, fortunately it was only my chaise lounger which felt the wrath of my boot. I will have my man contact yours post haste, as indeed my mood is has suffered grievously and this news of your kind offer has worked considerable wonder in brightening it.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 27 2020 22:50:52
 
RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Pgh_flamenco

quote:

People probably want tonic water that has Quinine in it even though it’s not the same as hydroxychloroquine.

That’s what I was thinking, too. Also, there’s talk about a shortage of aluminum for cans and the manufacturers are prioritizing which pops get to fill them (I guess the most popular ones are first in line). Regardless the reason, there’s none to be found in these parts.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 27 2020 22:57:48
 
Pgh_flamenco

 

Posts: 1343
Joined: Dec. 5 2007
From: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

From what I’ve heard a lot of pop and beer sales occur in restaurants and bars. The shortage of cans is due to an increase in consumption at home. Breweries poured thousands of gallons of beer down the drain because there was no way to get it to the consumer. I would assume that products with the best profit margin that are selling at a high rate would be a priority.

Can you add something bitter to carbonated water to make it taste more like tonic water?

_____________________________

  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 27 2020 23:30:59
 
RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Pgh_flamenco

There are craft tonic syrups available locally that use all natural ingredients and are pretty good. Expensive, though.

There’s nothing quite as thirst quenching or as satisfying as a nice, cold G&T on a hot summer’s evening, although it’s more of an occasional indulgence for me rather than a regular thing. But it sure is nice to be able to have one when the mood hits, so I think I’ll pick up a bottle of the syrup. Probably healthier anyways.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 28 2020 2:09:56
 
Ricardo

Posts: 12682
Joined: Dec. 14 2004
From: Washington DC

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Pgh_flamenco

quote:

Can you add something bitter to carbonated water to make it taste more like tonic water?


Yes ... MORE GIN!

For the record I prefer Hendricks. Tangeray beefeater etc is good too, not a fan of Bombay sapphire but I of course tolerate if that’s all I can get.

_____________________________

CD's and transcriptions available here:
www.ricardomarlow.com
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 28 2020 18:02:17
 
Auda

 

Posts: 201
Joined: Sep. 28 2019
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Ricardo

quote:

For the record I prefer Hendricks. Tangeray beefeater etc is good too, not a fan of Bombay sapphire but I of course tolerate if that’s all I can get.


I would recommend giving Seagram's gin a try. A lot of the time now when/if I do find tonic water I will purchase the entire stock.

Cheers
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 28 2020 18:18:02
 
BarkellWH

Posts: 3146
Joined: Jul. 12 2009
From: Washington, DC

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

Rob, I would like to suggest you try a favorite drink of old British colonials in Malaya--a "gin pahit." I am familiar with it, having served four years at the U.S. Embassy in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, and rereading Somerset Maugham's short stories about every six or seven years, many of which were set in British Malaya. The word "pahit" in the Malay language ("Bahasa Melayu") means "bitter" and a gin pahit consists of gin and Angostura bitters with ice in a martini glass. Take your favorite gin and pick up a bottle of Angostura bitters, and your set.

The Long Bar at Raffles Hotel in Singapore uses 2/3 gin to 1/3 Angostura bitters, but of course you use the ratio of gin to Angostura bitters that best suits your taste. Fix yourself a gin pahit and sit out on your verandah (or porch or deck, I forgot that we are in the 21st century) about 6:00pm for a refreshing sundowner, thinking of the old days in Malaya. Good days, those, made even better by the gin pahit in your hand.

Bill

_____________________________

And the end of the fight is a tombstone white,
With the name of the late deceased,
And the epitaph drear, "A fool lies here,
Who tried to hustle the East."

--Rudyard Kipling
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 28 2020 19:01:04
 
hamia

 

Posts: 373
Joined: Jun. 25 2004
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to BarkellWH

quote:

ORIGINAL: BarkellWH

Rob, I would like to suggest you try a favorite drink of old British colonials in Malaya--a "gin pahit." I am familiar with it, having served four years at the U.S. Embassy in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, and rereading Somerset Maugham's short stories about every six or seven years, many of which were set in British Malaya. The word "pahit" in the Malay language ("Bahasa Melayu") means "bitter" and a gin pahit consists of gin and Angostura bitters with ice in a martini glass. Take your favorite gin and pick up a bottle of Angostura bitters, and your set.

The Long Bar at Raffles Hotel in Singapore uses 2/3 gin to 1/3 Angostura bitters, but of course you use the ratio of gin to Angostura bitters that best suits your taste. Fix yourself a gin pahit and sit out on your verandah (or porch or deck, I forgot that we are in the 21st century) about 6:00pm for a refreshing sundowner, thinking of the old days in Malaya. Good days, those, made even better by the gin pahit in your hand.

Bill


Get your emergency grab bag ready Bill as your fond thoughts of past colonial days will have put you on the radar of the cancel culturistas. You may need to go dark. Your contacts should serve you well but be vigilant. They are everywhere...
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 28 2020 20:35:24
 
RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to BarkellWH

Well, I picked up some craft tonic syrup, made with cinchona, lemon, and lime. I’m going to try out the Pahit, too, but that’s a pretty strong drink, so maybe I’ll cut it with some soda and see how it goes.

This summer I’ve discovered two gins that I really like. One of them, Sipsmith’s London Dry, is a classic styled gin, nothing fancy, it just does the job well. It’s priced at about the same level as Hendricks, maybe a touch less. The other one is a French gin called Citadelle, which is priced around the same as Bombay or Tanqueray. It’s pretty flavourful, I’d take it over either of those two any day, although I don’t mind Tanqueray. But I’m perfectly happy with some Beefeater or Gordon’s in a G&T, they work just fine. Seagrams doesn’t appear to be available here.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 28 2020 22:45:55
 
Estevan

Posts: 1859
Joined: Dec. 20 2006
From: Torontolucía

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to BarkellWH

quote:

Fix yourself a gin pahit and sit out on your verandah (or porch or deck, I forgot that we are in the 21st century) about 6:00pm for a refreshing sundowner, thinking of the old days in Malaya. Good days, those, made even better by the gin pahit in your hand.

Ensure that your punkah wallah is on duty. (And, of course, that he addresses you as Tuan.)

_____________________________

Me da igual. La música es música.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 29 2020 2:25:44
 
Morante

 

Posts: 1629
Joined: Nov. 21 2010
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Ricardo

Hola maestro Ricardo

next time u are in Andalucía, try Rives Black label; it is an extraordinary gin. Best with the peel of a whole lemon hung from the rim of the glass. I prefer it with Sprite, but with anything else according to gusto personal.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 29 2020 16:21:22
 
Ricardo

Posts: 12682
Joined: Dec. 14 2004
From: Washington DC

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Morante

quote:

ORIGINAL: Morante

Hola maestro Ricardo

next time u are in Andalucía, try Rives Black label; it is an extraordinary gin. Best with the peel of a whole lemon hung from the rim of the glass. I prefer it with Sprite, but with anything else according to gusto personal.


Morante!!!

I will! In fact that name rings a bell, but it was usually “befeatah con Tony” down there.
Sprite works too of course! Even with manzanilla for a poor man’s rebujito.

_____________________________

CD's and transcriptions available here:
www.ricardomarlow.com
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 29 2020 17:03:15
 
Estevan

Posts: 1859
Joined: Dec. 20 2006
From: Torontolucía

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Ricardo

quote:

it was usually “befeatah con Tony” down there.

A bit of high-level trivia connected to another thread: Many years ago I had lunch with Julian Bream, and his prelude to the meal was "Beefeater and water". Tony was not there. Later that night, he commenced his post-concert unwinding with a double 'wiki' - as they say in Andalú, though of course he was speaking English.

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Me da igual. La música es música.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Aug. 30 2020 21:49:36
 
estebanana

Posts: 7999
Joined: Oct. 16 2009
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to BarkellWH

quote:

The Long Bar at Raffles Hotel in Singapore uses 2/3 gin to 1/3 Angostura bitters, but of course you use the ratio of gin to Angostura bitters that best suits your taste. Fix yourself a gin pahit and sit out on your verandah (or porch or deck, I forgot that we are in the 21st century) about 6:00pm for a refreshing sundowner, thinking of the old days in Malaya. Good days, those, made even better by the gin pahit in your hand.

Bill


Angostura is a natural with Gin because its similar to the aromatic additives to the fragrant gins. Angostura is made with roots and a bunch of spices.

If the pahit drink too strong-

no tonic, use soda water agua mineral con gas

Yield: makes 1 Cocktail
Ingredients

1 1⁄2 oz. navy-strength gin
1⁄2 lime
10 dashes Angostura bitters
2 oz. tonic or agua con gas
Instructions
Pour gin into an ice-filled rocks glass; squeeze in half a lime and drop into drink. Stir in bitters and tonic.

Possibly a bit too much information here, but I've arrived at this recipe over time and have kept it the same. I have to ensure continuity in the recipe because one of my many mistresses will be making it for me depending on whom I decide to visit any evening. Rather than suffering an uneven taste experience each residence I have a mistress is well provised with gins and tonics, but my taste for tonic has waned in recent years, and thus the preference for agua mineral con gas.

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  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 4 2020 4:25:43
 
davewphx

Posts: 51
Joined: Jul. 11 2011
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

Estevan, you inspired me to get a bottle of Beefeater. Arizona seems to have no shortage of tonic water, but alas the Schweppes that I bought is too sweet for me now. I may have to go to the seltzer water route of estebanana.....

_____________________________

Dave
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 4 2020 14:56:50
 
Richard Jernigan

Posts: 3016
Joined: Jan. 20 2004
From: Austin, Texas USA

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to estebanana

I am clearly only an amateur when it comes to gin.

Looking back I find that besides a wife or girlfriend I have always had a female (platonic) best friend, since I was six years old. As an Air Force brat and generally itinerant person, there have been more than one.

In the '60s in Austin, I would drop in unannounced on my friends Pat and Jeanie. There were eight or ten of us on such terms, an improvised family. Jeanie would lift an eyebrow. If I nodded, she would pour a Tanqueray and Schweppes, with a squeeze of fresh lime, set out a bowl of peanuts, and sit down at the table to discuss the way of the world.

Last September Pat passed away. I went to Juneau, Alaska for the funeral. The afternoon I arrived a friend picked me up at the airport and took me to Jeanie's house up on the hill. After we walked in Jeanie gave me a hug, then lifted an eyebrow. I nodded, she went to the kitchen and reappeared with a Tanquery/tonic, and a bowl of peanuts. We sat down at the table.

It was as if fifty years had passed in the blink of an eye.

RNJ
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 5 2020 20:48:12
 
RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Richard Jernigan

...and we never stop learning. This thread inspired me to try something different last night so I cut the tonic with about a third of agua con gas and added a couple of healthy splashes of Angostura. Very tasty. The bitters marry well with the tonic and gin.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 5 2020 22:01:54
 
BarkellWH

Posts: 3146
Joined: Jul. 12 2009
From: Washington, DC

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

quote:

...and we never stop learning. This thread inspired me to try something different last night so I cut the tonic with about a third of agua con gas and added a couple of healthy splashes of Angostura. Very tasty. The bitters marry well with the tonic and gin.


I hope you enjoyed it on the verandah. No doubt you were dressed for dinner later at the club, which was hosting the District Officer who is making his rounds of the rubber plantations. The talk, of course, is of a planter up-country who was stabbed by one of his tappers who apparently had run amok.

Bill

_____________________________

And the end of the fight is a tombstone white,
With the name of the late deceased,
And the epitaph drear, "A fool lies here,
Who tried to hustle the East."

--Rudyard Kipling
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 5 2020 22:38:17
 
estebanana

Posts: 7999
Joined: Oct. 16 2009
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to BarkellWH

quote:


I hope you enjoyed it on the verandah. No doubt you were dressed for dinner later at the club, which was hosting the District Officer who is making his rounds of the rubber plantations. The talk, of course, is of a planter up-country who was stabbed by one of his tappers who apparently had run amok.


Hell of a thing there Barkell, I heard about that. Have to admire the stabbing chap as that planter was brute. Reminds me of an incident that happened when I was a boy sent to live with my uncle the mercantile exchange man in the Upper Effendi. Why there was a crooked planter there who went absolutely king of Belgium on his workers. One day they tied him upside down to a rubber tree and carved him open with the lid from a tin can and shard of broken gin bottle. They kept him alive three days whilst they filleted him like a Christmas goose. It’s said he was so foul an individual that the local police refused to visit the property during the flaying.

My uncle said let that be a lesson to you, don’t be stingy with the gin.

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  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 6 2020 2:45:06
 
RobF

Posts: 951
Joined: Aug. 24 2017
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to estebanana

quote:

...with the lid from a tin can and shard of broken gin bottle.

Egads! How distressing to associate two of the mainstay tools of our craft with such a macabre tale. Could not a thorough shellacking have sufficed?
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 6 2020 3:00:36
 
estebanana

Posts: 7999
Joined: Oct. 16 2009
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

quote:

gads! How distressing to associate two of the mainstay tools of our craft with such a macabre tale. Could not a thorough shellacking have sufficed?


True, true, nothing scrapes down ribs like a fresh shard of a Bombay bottle.

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  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Sep. 6 2020 7:18:05
 
estebanana

Posts: 7999
Joined: Oct. 16 2009
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to RobF

I know this may not be the place to look, but I’m still seeking that Swiss clinic that does thumb replacement operations.

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https://www.stephenfaulkguitars.com
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Nov. 4 2020 13:11:42
 
Richard Jernigan

Posts: 3016
Joined: Jan. 20 2004
From: Austin, Texas USA

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to estebanana

You are evidently unaware of the "straw hat" process for changing the shape of your thumbnail. It requires a 4-poster bed, a straw hat and 1 liter of gin of your choice, at least 80 proof. 90 proof would be better.

The procedure is as follows.

1. Place straw hat on one of the bedposts at the foot of the bed.

2. Climb into the bed, make yourself comfortable, assuring a clear view of the two bedposts at the foot of the bed..

3. Drink a hefty shot of gin.

4. Look at the straw hat.

5. Repeat steps 3 and 4 until there is a straw hat on each of the two bedposts at the foot of the bed.

You may ask, how does this change the shape of your thumbnail? In fact, it does not. But if the procedure is faithfully executed, you will no longer be concerned about the shape of your thumbnail.

You are welcome,

RNJ
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Nov. 5 2020 2:45:51
 
estebanana

Posts: 7999
Joined: Oct. 16 2009
 

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Richard Jernigan

Jernigan, my word that’s brilliant.
Question, can Texas bluebonnets be used as herbals to add to the gin?

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  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Nov. 5 2020 7:30:40
 
Richard Jernigan

Posts: 3016
Joined: Jan. 20 2004
From: Austin, Texas USA

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to estebanana

quote:

ORIGINAL: estebanana

Question, can Texas bluebonnets be used as herbals to add to the gin?


I should think so. However this is a theoretical response, untested by personal experience.

Empirical evidence supports the straw hat process.

RNJ
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Nov. 5 2020 19:06:34
 
Estevan

Posts: 1859
Joined: Dec. 20 2006
From: Torontolucía

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Richard Jernigan

quote:

You are evidently unaware of the "straw hat" process for changing the shape of your thumbnail. It requires a 4-poster bed, a straw hat and 1 liter of gin of your choice, at least 80 proof. 90 proof would be better.

The procedure is as follows.

That is a piece of real American folklore! Apparently the method can be adapted to various purposes.
I first heard it, handed down as a cold remedy, from the great folksinger and story teller Michael Cooney, who was my upstairs neighbour for a while. We used to hear each other practising. It was a nice time.

_____________________________

Me da igual. La música es música.
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Dec. 23 2020 1:01:52
 
Richard Jernigan

Posts: 3016
Joined: Jan. 20 2004
From: Austin, Texas USA

RE: Shortage of Tonic Water (in reply to Estevan

quote:

ORIGINAL: Estevan

quote:

You are evidently unaware of the "straw hat" process for changing the shape of your thumbnail. It requires a 4-poster bed, a straw hat and 1 liter of gin of your choice, at least 80 proof. 90 proof would be better.

The procedure is as follows.

That is a piece of real American folklore! Apparently the method can be adapted to various purposes.
I first heard it, handed down as a cold remedy, from the great folksinger and story teller Michael Cooney, who was my upstairs neighbour for a while. We used to hear each other practising. It was a nice time.


Yes, I heard it from my grandfather Neville Jernigan, as a cold remedy employing Bourbon whiskey. Grandfather was born in 1882. He attributed the straw hat cure to his father William Hunsdon Jernigan, born 1831, using the same spirit.

RNJ
  REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |  Date Dec. 24 2020 1:25:38
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