Welcome to one of the most active flamenco sites on the Internet. Guests can read most posts but if you want to participate click here to register.
This site is dedicated to the memory of Paco de Lucía, Ron Mitchell, Guy Williams, Linda Elvira, Philip John Lee, Craig Eros, Ben Woods, David Serva and Tom Blackshear who went ahead of us.
We receive 12,200 visitors a month from 200 countries and 1.7 million page impressions a year. To advertise on this site please contact us.
Posts: 2697
Joined: Jun. 7 2010
From: The South Ireland
Can you handle the truth ...??
Following on from another thread about what people think of Flamenco ...I suppose its time to let you all in on ....
The true and verdad invention of flamenco
....like the kind of stuff you can’t find in books ...or even in Spain (assuming that Spain is a real country)
One day, a long time ago ...like in the 1950's or something ....there was this guy called Juan..I think ...and he was a bit of a lazy cabrón anyway, and so one day he was out sitting under a tree in ''Spain ‘‘doing absolutely sweet Fk all. He had an old acoustic guitar with him as that was all he could afford...what with not working and everything...
So ,...he was practicing his first chord ...E maj and basically just moving that up and down , when a fly landed on his guitar ...So , he hit it ..Or ...he tried to anyway, but the Spanish fly was all just too quick for him ...he was gone, and yet soon back to bug him and land on his guitar again .... Not wishing to loose valuable practice time with his, now movable and multi-functional, E maj chord ...he just kept on trying to hit the fly in between chords now and then...You know it was one of them flies that , like , lands on your nose and then you brush it away and it lands on your cheek .. and then back on your nose again ...and is irritatingly persistent,. Anyone who has lived in a country that has ..A).. Heat ...and B) Sh1t ... would have came across flies like that ....Anyway, I digress.. Soon a friend of his ..Possibly also called Juan ...yeah, lets keep it simple and call all the protagonists Juan...so Juan (2) came along and said ''Hey man ...what are you doing?'' ..but like in Spanish language stuff, probably ..like ..''Que pasa tronco ..'' .and all that, and was speaking with a one of those upside down question marks that I don’t know how to pronounce ..¿ and letters like n's with a little wigglely 'manitas de plata ' above it ..like that ñ..
Juan (1) said ' I'm like trying to learn this chord, but the flies here are really persistent, and fast, and sooo annoying '' So Juan (2) said (actually I think I'll change his name to Jose ..as it’s too confusing to have 2 Juan’s ....) So anyway Jose said ''That’s Ok man ..I'll sort that out for you , I know how to get them fickers , I’m really quick ..The trick is to wait a bit and then just clap your hands together and you could get 2 at a time ...''
But , After a short while of clapping and banging and playing, Jose started shouting ''ay ay ay ay'' ...and just at that moment another friend of theirs came along ... a young girl called Maria ...she too could speak with ñ and ¿....''??ñ¿whats goiñg on añd what you shoutiñg about ??ñ¿'' she asked ... '''
‘‘It’s ñot the flies that are bugging me '' said Jose '' it’s the ants,''There’s a sh1t load of them all over here '' ''Also'' he added ‘‘if I stand still long enough there are all over my sandals and feet ...and these guys bite ...'' 'I’ll get them ' shouted Maria. .who had a fear of insects .. So she lifted the edge of her skirt up and started stamping all over the place to get as many as she could ...
Suddenly amongst all the clapping and stamping and flies and guitar hitting and shouting ...they realized they might have just invented something..... ‘‘Yeah '' said Juan '' but if we tell anyone how we did it ..They just won’t believe us ...'' ‘‘And ''said Jose '' it wont catch on much anyway ''
True story............
Images are resized automatically to a maximum width of 800px
Posts: 2697
Joined: Jun. 7 2010
From: The South Ireland
RE: Can you handle the truth ...?? (in reply to mark indigo)
oohhh you noticed my nighttime after pub ,, seems like a good idea at the time ....posting habits Mark..,...
I have been trying to be careful with that , so as not to get into trouble ..
Unfortunately it may mean I talk even more Carp when sober .....I dont know why I wrote it .. it just seemed right at the time and I kinda couldn't stop after the first bit ...
like at first it's raining cats and dogs and then it raining mice and frogs ....
Posts: 2697
Joined: Jun. 7 2010
From: The South Ireland
RE: Can you handle the truth ...?? (in reply to mezzo)
yeah ...you could work a hemorrhoid in there .....
If he was sitting down , i kinda envisaged him standing ... but thats ok ... the story writes itself ....
Funny word is hemorrhoid., if you look at it long enough .....maybe it should be called an assteroid instead ......either way its still a pain in the arse
Posts: 2697
Joined: Jun. 7 2010
From: The South Ireland
RE: Can you handle the truth ...?? (in reply to mark74)
no i didnt go to the pub ... things get really weird after a few drinks .. usually just before I get thrown out ...
Anyway , combining words is very creative and takes a lot of thinking to get a good one ,,, dont be-little yourself .. i could easily get thrown out of 2 or 3 bars before i came up with anything worth printing here ...depending on the subject I suppose .......
Posts: 15725
Joined: Dec. 14 2004
From: Washington DC
RE: Can you handle the truth ...?? (in reply to El Kiko)
quote:
Funny word is hemorrhoid., if you look at it long enough .....maybe it should be called an assteroid instead ......either way its still a pain in the arse
oh man I was just watching National Lampoon Vacation last night, and the redneck cousin said the same thing!
RE: Can you handle the truth ...?? (in reply to El Kiko)
This world is unjust. ... Nothing new, really.
There is Kiko slurping in affluence, and here are we whome I invited for a musician "party" days ago. A bunch of folks with no whatever mind-altering substance available. Just with guitars, records and discussions, dead sober until 6:00 am or so.
Man, am I fed up with illiterates´ hypocricy. Just gimme that mug and leave me alone, please.
Me now asked for some self-brewn, hoping this time it to be no c**p nor blinding. ( In a Russian village there were deads from self-made stuff, just last week I think.)
Posts: 2697
Joined: Jun. 7 2010
From: The South Ireland
RE: Can you handle the truth ...?? (in reply to Ricardo)
quote:
said the same thing
I didnt know it was in a film ... suppose its not too hard to figure out though , its probably in other stuff as well ... ''Most good things have already been said far too many times......''Shane Claiborne...(b.1975.)
Printable Version
New Messages
No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages
Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages
Locked w/o New Messages
Post New Thread