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Posts: 907
Joined: Mar. 13 2006
From: Vancouver, Canada
A tirar flores
Something in another thread made me think of this (well that and the Mexican waitress I was flirting with this evening).
Tirar flores means "to throw flowers." There is, among some men, a belief that when a woman is beautiful, it is a man's burden, or duty, to inform her of it. In some places, this is also called piropear and these compliments can also be called piropos.
Now, there's some confusion. Some people think that guys who are loitering on street corners and say things like mamacita! and things that can be viewed as crude are doing this. Unfortunately, all they're doing is giving it a bad name.
Men who do it well, are usually charming. Imagine a classy sort of complimentary pick-up line, delivered with no pressure (kind of a pick-up line that doesn't care if it picks up). Unfortunately, it's a rare quality.
Maybe some of our world travellers could maybe tell us about any they've seen. Or maybe Kate (or any other girl in Spain, or been there - I just can't think of anyone else at the moment), could share any memorable ones. Maybe?
Can't give you any actual quotes because my Spanish isn't quick enough to pick up the words. But I know what you mean. In Spanish-speaking countries I have received comments and not been offended because I felt it was not done in a sexist way but more in an appreciative way.
I think I can't see anything wrong in compliments as long as they can be two-way. And that's the problem. How would it be taken if a woman said something complimentary to a man? Possibly as a brazen invitation!
That said, I called a Spanish guy a know 'gracioso' the other night. I was just being nice, and honest, not flirting, and he seemed pleased that I thought that about him.
Something in another thread made me think of this (well that and the Mexican waitress I was flirting with this evening).
Tirar flores means "to throw flowers." There is, among some men, a belief that when a woman is beautiful, it is a man's burden, or duty, to inform her of it. In some places, this is also called piropear and these compliments can also be called piropos.
isnt it pretty much the same thing only the guys that do it so that its not obvious and threatening do it in a longher more round about way..i think the intent...or should i say hope is the same isnt it ? only difference is the delivery
you either mean the compliments in wich case you are attracted to her so if the oportunity presented itself you would take it but you dont wanna come straight out and say it incase of rejection...this way atleast is midlle of the road, can be interpreted as just politenes.
or you dont mean it and are just doing it to be likeble ( and if you are of latin background you would still sleep with her ...because afterall shes a woman , latins are very very sencitive people ..they would never ever hurt a womans feelings by saying no)
i never understood the guys at the corners lol i have never ever see a woman stop and say " I was going to go get my hair done but you have convinced me, sure lets go back to your moms hose and you can show me what a real man does "
and if you are of latin background you would still sleep with her ...because afterall shes a woman , latins are very very sencitive poeple ..they would never ever hurt a womans feelings by saying no)
Flo that's a racist stereotype!! And I haven't noticed men from other cultures being too picky either.....
Thanks for that tip Sean - yes it can be so difficult to get the nuances of another language right. Fortunately this person is a friend so was pleased. I will be very careful no to do it in a sarcastic way - I really did mean I thought he was very witty
PS What would you recommend for someone who is just really funny and friendly - no romantic involvement. Simpatico? Amable?
Its funny but in Spain people quite openly look at you whereas in UK everyone pretends not to be looking at you. On the local bus one day an attractive American girl complained very loudly to her friend "Everyone's staring at me. What's their problem ".
My favourite compliment was when an old man took one look at me and said "Que barbaridad !!!" LOL I was wearing a pretty short skirt at the time.
"What would you recommend for someone who is just really funny and friendly - no romantic involvement. Simpatico? Amable?"
We would say "¡Que arte tienes, (name) or (picha!)" . If you are more intimate, you could say "¡Que arte tienes, cabrón or cabroncito or cabroncito mío! But "Cabrón" can be a mortal insult, so take care.
lets test some bad pick up lines on you not that theres any good ones out there lol
how is this... walk up to a girl and say " ok I am here ...what are your other 2 wishes ?"
Our Mediterranean vanities are vastly betrayed, dear Florian… did you realize that you and I are the only two jerks who have provided the Forum with our own face? It may speak volumes of our characters, may it not?
I have heard from my fellow Italians some of the dumbest pick-up lines, and have drawn a simple yet useful conclusion: it does not really matter what you say. The selected battle-theater (approaching a lady on the street, at a bar or party) ultimately also does not matter. We are judged within seconds of approaching (and most of the time even before we do that, while we are building a heart-beat zero salivation and pump adrenaline, while staring at her). Yet “you are beautiful” or any variation thereof maybe the least advisable “attack”. One should come in knowing that the music started already, there is a rhythm to follow and adjust to…. You do not come in on 1 but on 3.
My personal theory, based on such premises, is that one should use a variety of overlapping lines as in “sorry I was staring at you, there is a Mozart concert tomorrow, and I noticed how well you coordinated your pearls with the outfit, I hate matching things, and believe in blending, you must either work in fashion or subscribe to all those glossy magazines; oh boy, I did not realize how shy I am really, I hope you like classical music? or I will bore you to death” and so on…
Now break it down into a few basics, the apparently chaotic assortment of lines supplies a general sense that the approaching threat is a sophisticated yet normal man, confident enough to attack but restrained and confused a trifle. There are now pending several subjects a lady could engage, fashion, classical music, dating and pick-up lines… you distributed compliments, but in a indirect fashion, an always sound approach with women, in my humble experience. But the world may have changed since I got married twelve years ago, and still counting.
ORIGINAL: gj Michelob did you realize that you and I are the only two jerks who have provided the Forum with our own face? It may speak volumes of our characters, may it not?
LOL I used to have my photo as my avatar......must be the Italian in me !! When the forum changed back it returned to my original one and have not been able to change it since. Keeps saying error when loading whatever I do, so am stuck with the wild falling flapping woman.
ORIGINAL: Exitao Kate (or any other girl in Spain,
Exitao apologises for snapping at you a while back. I'm sorry. Nice to see everything has calmed down so have crawled out from beneath my rock.
Now I have no real objection to being called a girl, though some of my friends would happily bite your head off for that LOL, possible the same ones you are scared of.
Anyway I thought I should introduce myself properly. I've been trying to change my atavar but just cant so instead of a visual image I'll tell you about me. I've been here so long sometimes I just assume people know me but we've got each other wrong on a few posts now so maybe this will help. My parents are Welsh, though I was brought up in England. I will be 48 next month and I have been living with my husband for 25 years now. We have no kids but a rainbow tribe of Godchildren, ( Jamaican, Moroccan, Gitano, Dutch , Catalan and English) who make me very happy. I have a first class degree in Spanish and Latin American Studies from North London University. I met my husband Harold while working on an anti-racism campaign in London, having previously seen him performing with his band. It was love at first sight for him but I was probably too stoned at the time to notice. Anyway I've always had a thing about guitarists. They have great nails and I love a good back scratch. He is a musician and music producer. We have been living in Granada for about 12 years now where we have a recording studio. We do a lot of work with flamencos which is why, although I dont play or dance, I am on this forum. Actually I do dance but never in public, I also sing when forced to because everyone enjoys a good laugh.
Oh and the funniest pick up I had ever had in Granada was a guy from Jerez who asked if I wanted to learn to dance. He said he would teach me how dance a bulería and then proceeded to make up a dance which was meant to impress me. The bar went quiet as he made a total fool out of himself. Afterwards he was told that I knew exactly what a bulería was and he was devastated which was even funnier. We both had a good laugh about it.
Boy: Ye know....ye don't sweat much for a fat girl..
..i am pretty sure someone would get punched with that one here
but when you are scottish around here you can say whatever you like....by the time the girl figured out what you said u are allready on your after... cigarette
My big brother was brought up in the 50's...(Elvis and all that). Ultra-Violet lighting was brought into the dance halls as a "cool" and "atmospheric" fashion.
One evening, while dancing a slow "smoodgy" dance ("Are You Lonesome Tonight") ....or something, and fancying himself as a bit of a lover-boy, he whispered in the girl's ear that he really liked the "stardust" effect in her hair and where did she get it from?
"Stardust? What do you mean stardust?". she said....
and if you are of latin background you would still sleep with her ...because afterall shes a woman , latins are very very sencitive poeple ..they would never ever hurt a womans feelings by saying no)
Flo that's a racist stereotype!! And I haven't noticed men from other cultures being too picky either.....
No, no, it's a cultural stereotype. My personal training in all things Latino indicates that it's a true stereo type. The idea is very simple:
"Well, if she wants with me and she's not too ugly, I'm a man, I will fulfilled my obligations, no matter how burdensome they may be." Usually followed by a sigh. And then a smile.
I suppose, Florian, you could think of it as a soft sell. Just putting it out there and maybe you get lucky. But there are also people who just feel the need to be charming, and make other people feel interesting, and the other sex feel attractive. The people who flirt with cashiers, tellers, and any woman he has occasion to speak to and thinks would have a pleasant smile. For a certain kind of charming man, that's a duty.
No worries. I never meant to attack you. And it's interesting. I always knew that the basis of an enduring relationship involved the "you scratch my back" concept. Apparently, some more literally than others.
It's always amazed and amused me the way Spanish speaking men are often fearless and willing to make fools of themselves for the sake of love. Or getting laid. As the case may be.
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, latins are very very sencitive people ..they would never ever hurt a womans feelings by saying no) 
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