A velvet vagina ?

A velvet vagina ? (Full Version)

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Florian -> A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 6:38:28)
I had to share this lol...One of the dancers went to see a Joaquin Cortes concert...its the one about his life... Apparently he comes on stage through a giant red velvet vagina [:D][:D][:D] and i am trying really really hard to imagine it !![&:] all autobiographies should start that way ! i would get myself more educated about other peoples lifes...just not enough vaginas in stage props this days...people forghet where they came from ...I feel they could have taken it further too, his dad wasent represented and that is a litlle sexist...but i can sort of understand why not. imagine if there was an accident and the props felled on him and injured him lol ...he probably wanted to avoid that news headline "Oil prices set to go up again and dancer Joaquin Cortes gets injured during a performance last night when a giant penus collapsed on top of him, stay tuned for the story after this mesages.." hehe i am loughing at my own jokes but if i was a comedian this would be gold .. i can go on forever with this ...." it took the safety officers on call up to 5 minutes to set mr Cortes free...or however long it takes to finish a cigaret.." pshh [:D][:D][;)][:)][8\|] I been searching for photos on the net about this concert...i cant find anything if anyone has anything or knows anything or has seen it...tell me !![:D] i want to know everything, how was it .. I want to see the velvet Vagina !! if its the last one i see..i wanna see this one ! wouldnt surrprise me if this was from the show ? Images are resized automatically to a maximum width of 800px

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 7:17:30)
hes done everything, theres no more clothes left to take off and i am starting to get worried about what he gonna do next.. . nNouU.[8\|] Images are resized automatically to a maximum width of 800px

Pimientito -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 11:04:07)
quote: I feel they could have taken it further too [:D][:D][:D] You mean he didnt re-enact his own conception!! While he was at it, couldnt he have bought Naomi Campbell into the show to re-enact his love life somewhere too. Dude - thats the funniest thing I've heard this week!! Having a semi serious accident on stage in a model of your mums vagina has got to be the basis for a new Almodovar movie as far as I'm concerned. Sometimes the flamencos take themselves WAY WAY too seriously. I remember seeing Juan Andres Maya doing a sort of flamenco passion play which ended up as a kind of live homo erotic sado maschist fantasy where he was being whipped by two bare chested greased up romans and then tied to a cross. Kate will back me up here.....it was terrible and so NOT NOT flamenco...yet somehow he got away with with it. I was cringing in the seat and waiting for it to all be over.

Pimientito -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 11:15:04)
quote: the basis for a new Almodovar movie Actually I'm pretty sure thats where he got the idea...remember "Talk to her" (Warning - Do not open if you are shocked by scenes from Spanish movies. We Europeans are very wierd)

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 11:20:39)
quote: I remember seeing Juan Andres Maya doing a sort of flamenco passion play which ended up as a kind of live homo erotic sado maschist fantasy where he was being whipped by two bare chested greased up romans and then tied to a cross. [:D][:D][:D] did Mel Gibson direct that one too ? i think the gypsies are the only minority left he hasent yet offended.

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 11:26:27)
quote: remember "Talk to her" Ive never heard of it...but it looks good !! kind of the European version of " Honey i shrunk the kids" [:D] whats the story is the guy really small or is tyhe woman really big ? quote: (Warning - Do not open if you are shocked by scenes from Spanish movies. I am only shocked if Spanish movies dont contain shocking scenes

Pimientito -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 11:34:57)
quote: whats the story The plot of "talk to her" is revolves around a girl in a coma who has a baby. The guy who is the father is actually the girls nurse and he has to see a therapist who is married to a female bullfighter who gets gored. The girl comes out of the coma and edventually falls in love with the therapist. Somewhere in the movie a dream sequence (i cant remeber whose) where a man shrinks and shrinks and edventually ends up living inside his wifes vagina. BTW- this is not the most Bizarre film plot from Spain!!

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 11:42:43)
quote: The plot of "talk to her" is revolves around a girl in a coma who has a baby. The guy who is the father is actually the girls nurse and he has to see a therapist who is married to a female bullfighter who gets gored. The girl comes out of the coma and edventually falls in love with the therapist. heheh only in europe [:D][:D] thats brillant...i wish we had Eurovision everyday on tv here !! ps..i think i found photos from Joaquin's show....after the concert he allowed audience to come up on stage and inspect the props [:D]in the memorabilia shop you could even buy necklaces and bracelets made from his umbilical cord. on a side note while i was checking my spelling for "umbilical cord" and beeing in the images section of google where i found all this photos , i saw some disturbing pictures...it will take some time before i am ever able to think sexualy again [&:] Images are resized automatically to a maximum width of 800px

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:25:06)
I hope noone finds this thread offencive and if you do....dont be a pus*y its natural [:)]

Kate -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:27:15)
quote: ORIGINAL: Pimientito I remember seeing Juan Andres Maya doing a sort of flamenco passion play which ended up as a kind of live homo erotic sado maschist fantasy where he was being whipped by two bare chested greased up romans and then tied to a cross. Kate will back me up here.....it was terrible and so NOT NOT flamenco...yet somehow he got away with with it. I was cringing in the seat and waiting for it to all be over. The funniest thing was the looks on the guitarists faces. Total embarrassment but you'd think they would be used to him by now.

XXX -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:42:11)
OMG how can someone be that narcissistic [8\|] Apparently he has success on the girls audience with it. It is a sick, sick world we are living in. [&:] Paco only has his little tree on stage, and thats it. On the concert i attended, he even hadnt that. There were only 5 chairs on stage.

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:48:25)
quote: Apparently he has success on the girls audience with it. . does he ?? that's terrible !! ...........you know... it wouldnt be totaly untrue if i used one in a gig, i mean..afterall hes not the only one that came out of one [:)]

koella -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:54:16)
LOL Flo. I can't stop laughing.

koella -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:57:51)
quote: ORIGINAL: Florian really ?? that's terrible !! ...........you know... it wouldnt be totaly untrue if i used one in a gig, i mean..afterall hes not the only one that came out of one [:)] Of course you would be the first one that came out with a guitar in his hands.

XXX -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 12:59:49)
did you ever had the feeling, that you think you are wasting your time with thinking of something really really sick, useless and nonsense, but you cant think of something else?

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 13:00:04)
quote: Paco only has his little tree on stage, and thats it. maybe he was adopted quote: did you ever had the feeling, that you think you are wasting your time with thinking of something really really sick, useless and nonsense, but you cant think of something else? Never [:D][:D][&:][&o]

XXX -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 13:02:54)
quote: ORIGINAL: Florian maybe he was adopted ... or had a cesarian [;)]

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 13:04:37)
i am acctualy really tired, its really late here but i am scared to go to sleep, all this "props" talk... i am afraid i will have nightmares about large velvet vaginas chasing me

XXX -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 13:07:10)
anyways, flo please let me know if you have pictures. I guess you will post them here anyway [:D] if they are not too offensive i guess. Or maybe you will just post them anyway [:D][:D][:D] quote: i am afraid i will have nightmares about large velvet vaginas chasing me you had the same dream? or nightmare. .. ah.. yes.. whats props? anyway, bye and good night. (hey its late here too...what coincidence). its so sick.

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 13:18:11)
quote: whats props? stage props...the things they use to dress a stage, curtains, trees, whatever they use. quote: Or maybe you will just post them anyway[:D][:D][:D] Hey dont look at me[8\|] ...i didnt invent the vagina or the name...its hard to not mention it when you are talking about it in a flamenco context...it was either god or the Spanish that invented it [:)] but atlist i used the biological name, so i tried to keep it as clean as i can ..but its very hard when you are discusing ......well you know [:)] so i might have slipped a litlle, i apologise if anyone is offended

kovachian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 18:50:07)
LMAO! Oh man, I need a smoke to calm my nerves now. Would anyone like one? Images are resized automatically to a maximum width of 800px

Pgh_flamenco -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 15 2008 19:55:06)
quote: Apparently he comes on stage through a giant red velvet vagina Reminds me of the movie "Spinal Tap."

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 16 2008 10:57:04)
quote: Would anyone like one? UH yeah let me get my lips around those babyes [:D][:D] quote: Reminds me of the movie "Spinal Tap." heheh yeah Joaquin = Nigel if i was in tv, id do a reality show on him where i get the camers to follow him around all day to see what he gets up too

Haizum -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 24 2008 9:43:26)
Well, thats the most surreal ten mins I have spent on this site. And I am now blind

Ailsa -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 24 2008 11:07:15)
Guys I haven't joined in this thread so far because I've been feeling a bit confused. I mean, aren't all vaginas velvet?

koella -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 24 2008 11:25:59)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ailsa aren't all vaginas velvet? I would say it must be, when there's an entire dancer stuck in it.

Estevan -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 24 2008 11:57:21)
quote: Well, thats the most surreal ten mins I have spent on this site. And I am now blind Welcome back, mate!

Ron.M -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 24 2008 12:16:37)
quote: Guys I haven't joined in this thread so far because I've been feeling a bit confused. I mean, aren't all vaginas velvet? Phew...I've just returned from running my head under the cold tap here.... Stop it Ailsa, the last thing we need here is your comments. [:D][:D] Anyway... Back to the "other" stuff....ie Flamenco... This rasgueado thing is worth looking at closely. I'd say forget looking at playing rasgueado as some sort of a "set piece"....that you start on a certain finger and finish on a certain finger etc. I'm not an expert, but I reckon that the idea of trying to get independence of the fingers, like mark indigo seconded is the key to kind of "generalise" this technique without getting too caught up in how it is executed is the way to go. This is an example of a Tomatito thing I tried a while back and it would have been impossible for me to do if I had thought about rasgueado cycles having beginnings and ends on certain beats or fingers. I just basically forgot about technique and just tried to get into the rhythm. make sense? cheers, Ron Sorry this is in the wrong thread.... I'll go and run my head under the cold tap again...[:D]

Florian -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 24 2008 17:01:53)
quote: Guys I haven't joined in this thread so far because I've been feeling a bit confused. I mean, aren't all vaginas velvet? I dont know...it hard to tell from the magazines and movies quote: Well, thats the most surreal ten mins I have spent on this site. And I am now blind well I am sorry but it is your own fault.. you shouldnt bring that kind of thinking here and shouldnt have been doing that ....this is a flamenco forum [:D] .....everybody knows you go bind if you eep oing it oo much...

Haizum -> RE: A velvet vagina ? (Oct. 25 2008 2:52:06)
Cheers Estevan. I got banned from playing guitar Flo, I put the blame wholly on you dude.

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