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mark indigo -> RE: less of the back-biting guys! (May 27 2013 16:41:35)
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quote:
I think what is relevant is that people strive to write direct sentences. Simplify unclear language, cull out unneeded verbiage, use dictionaries to find the correct term, all for the sake of clear communication.
about all topics, by all members, all the time, here on the foro, because a lot of the time when arguments get heated to the point of becoming personal it seems that people aren't understanding what is actually being said.
like the interpretation of the request for less back-biting as censorship.....
....I think that misses the point....
....and i think the point is "play the ball, not the man" or in other words, discuss topics, feel free to express different points of view and ideas, but don't personally insult people for disagreeing or holding a different point of view.
I also think it would really help if instead of getting personal people actually tried to explain why they hold the point of view that they do, and backed up what they said. And if people tried to understand where other people are coming from and why, instead of ridiculing them.
And another thing, which is that in face to face interactions I rely so much on NVC, tone of voice, gestures etc., that tell me whether the person I am talking with is being serious or joking, sarcastic, ironic etc. etc. and here on the foro, with people I have for the most part never met, it seems communication is already complicated by all of those missing channels, so I feel that a lot more effort needs to go into the choice of the actual words used to avoid the all too common mix-ups.
Emoticons don't really fill the gap as several times I have realised too late that I have been using them incorrectly, this one particularly [8|] (didn't realise it meant eyes rolling comtemptuously). And insulting someone and following it with [:D] adds insult to injury. Emoticons might help a bit sometimes, but they are so limited when compared to the full gamut of NVC, and are a poor substitute for clear and direct communication.
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