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Pimientito -> RE: Officially nervous (May 14 2011 14:11:02)
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quote:
Experience is always a good thing
Yeah, I dont think money can buy that kind of experience. It was a really big night for me but very stressful. I had known I was going to play a solo spot for roughly a month and I already decided that it was going to be impossible to go up against the Habichuelas with a flamenco piece. My decision was to play a Zambra and the Sakura variations and I had been praticing like mad over the last couple of weeks.
On the day of the concert I found a clean suit, and walked to the theatre. Soundchecks were at 6.30. I went backstage and immediately found a scene of crazyness going on. The stage manager grabbed me and said "Great, another guitarist, which dancer are you with?"
I explained that I had already been asked to play a solo that was Japanese.
She looked at the program listing which was fast becoming a page of scribbles and lines. A lot of the artists on the bill hadnt turned up. To make matters more confusing, a lot of artists who WEREN'T on the bill had turned up to perform.
A team of Japanese girls were running round dressing room trying to change names on doors and supply everyone with drinks and sandwiches.
I was really hoping to play in the first half and definately before Juan Habichuela did his guitar solo.
"you cant play in the first half" I was told, "the tablao artists have to leave early...plus your piece fits better at the end, theres only time for one piece so you are playing the final solo before the fin de fiesta."
I suddenly felt a huge rush of adrenaline in my legs and a large desire to run away from the theatre...." you mean I have to follow those guys?"
She rushed me upstairs to the changing rooms. Percussionists were sitting in the hall practising on cajons. Guitarists were tuning up and going through scales and picados. Kids were running around and dancers were busy trying to sew flowers on to dresses and buckles on to shoes. Everyone was yelling at other and making the most noise possible.
Noone had a clue what was going on, what the order of show was, or even who would be accompanying who. I felt like a kid at the first day of school.
I tuned my guitar and went outside and immediately met up with Harold who joined me at a local bar.
Stage fright is a funny thing. I think there is a primal fear of facing a mob of people, a potentially dangerous situation. A little bit of nervous tension is not a bad thing for a musician to have before a performance. Adrenaline is secreted into the blood from glands above the kidneys. In small quantities it raises heart rate, increases concentration, improves memory and quickens reflexes....all useful stuff. The problem is that if nervousness turns to fear, adrenaline becomes your enemy. I felt blood circulating in my legs preparing me to run, my stomach and intestine wanted to empty to make my getaway faster, my hands were sweating as my hands prepared to fight and got hotter. I was conciously aware of these changes in my body but seemed unable to do anything to control them. I needed to calm down and get a glass of wine.
Alcohol can calm your nerves but dont take too much or your reflexes and timing dissappear again. Taking all these things into account I decided that 2 stiff drinks would probably do the trick and I started to feel much better, at least my legs stopped going wobbly.
By now the concert was starting so I went back inside the dressing rooms. Juan Habichuela was going thrrought the most complex and fast set of picado patterns. It was really amazing to watch and I kind of forgot for a while why I was there. I was definately calmer. I watched the show on the monitors until finally it was my turn to go on stage.
Waiting off stage seemed like an eternity, I fought off the adrenaline and walked onstage. Someone in the audience shouted "Pimientiiiiito!!" and I smiled and felt a bit better. The first chords of the piece were difficult. I could feel my fingers shaking. I played a wrong note in the introduction which put me off for a second and got a technical change wrong in the ligado section. However, the harmonics went well and by now I was more relaxed and starting to enjoy the piece, the third variation went well...The tremelo section came off my fingers as practiced...a few more notes and finish on a big chord....huge applause and I was ready to take my bow and leave. "remember to bow " I thought to myself "dont rush off stage"
Later I found out it was televised and I was genuinely buzzing for the next day.
The biggest lesson I learned about this gig was controling nerves and adrenaline. There comes a time when you just have to go through it. With so many friends in the audience and backstage it was impossible to back out. I think after this it has given me confidence to play almost anywhere because its doubtful that I would find myself in a more pressured situation.
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