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Rule 1: No auditions or "meetings"
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Miguel de Maria
Posts: 3532
Joined: Oct. 20 2003
From: Phoenix, AZ
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 Rule 1: No auditions or "meeti...
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I have to vent....
I have been playing in Phoenix for about 5 years, mostly as a background musician--you know, the guitar player in the corner during cocktail hour, wedding receptions, business functions, etc. It has suited me well because I used to suffer from extreme stage fright, which i have gradually overcome, and because my playing skills started off rather mediocre and, while improving, are hardly worth a concert. While I have not yet attained a Paco, Segovia, or Todd-like status, I have worked very hard on building and maintaining an impeccable reputation for punctuality and professionalism. I do my job, as a background musician, very well.
Now, one of the resorts called me and wanted me to do a gig. I was already booked, but was able to sub out of that one as a favor to the caterer at the resort. So now I am rebooked for the second date.
I get a call from the caterer, and she tells me that the client wants to "meet" with me...that all the entertainers the client is hiring have to "meet" with them. I say, can you just give them the demo CD I recorded, and the pictures of me that you have, as well as my resume with about 100 different venues I have played at and my client testimonials page?
She said, no they're "weird" and they want to "meet" with all the musicians. I have never had a request such as this. On the spot, I said yes... and now I am steaming that I have done so. The "meeting", I realize is an audition. An audition for the honor of giving up a gig for which I am already booked, an audition for a gig that I was under the impression that I was already booked, an audition for a job for which auditions are not required or conducted.
When you go into business for yourself, as opposed to just working through agencies, you begin to recognize the early signals of bad clients. Bad clients are demanding, cheap, and unpleasant people who want too much, don't want to pay for it, and always end up pissed off at the end. My wife, a lawyer, knows this syndrome well and does not accept bad clients. She has told me that no matter how much money they have, it's never worth it. They are 10x as much work as your other clients, will suck up your time and energy, have completely unreasonable demands, and will usually end up threatening to file a bar complaint or a malpractice suit by the end of the case. The warning signs are there. This is a bad client, all right.
What kind of person books you for a gig, then wants to audition you later? What kind of person demands that a background musician audition, although they have the CD and the pictures and high recommendation? The worst part is that I have already given a fee quote--before I heard about this stinking audition! If I knew the client was a bad client, I would have quoted twice as much money. That is how you handle bad clients...you increase the fee until the point where 1) they dont' want to hire you or 2) the money is actually worth the increased work, time, and unpleasantness.
Many of you (that is, if anyone has read this far) will probably think that I sound rather ornery and lazy about this whole affair. After all, a musician auditioning--imagine that. But I tell you, that's not how it works in this town. You don't ask a caterer to come and set up a half table of food, eat it, and then decide whether you want to hire him. You don't ask a landscaper to clean up your yard and if he does a good job, hire him on for the next week. You don't tell an office worker to sit at a desk and pull a shift and if he looks like he'lll do a good job, put him on the payroll. I am not a starving actor from the countryside staking my dreams on getting onto Broadway, I'm an established (if minor) musician, serving this small niche--and I don't do auditions!!
Calm down, Mike, calm down. You have to learn how to read the signs, and then trust your instincts. When I was waiting tables, the owner told me--"This table is your real estate, the customer is just borrowing it for an hour. You have to be in control, if you let the customer monopolize yoru time, you are dead!" He was a rather flambouyant Mexican, a swinger, and a lazy dictator who ran his restaurant into the ground, but in this he was true.
If you can't listen to my demo, look at my picture, read my repertoire, read my resume, and peruse my testimonials, and make a decision--then you are going to have to look for another background musician (that rhymes). I am just going to have to bend over and go along for the ride on this one, since I already foolishly committed to the "meeting", but Rule 1: is solid--no auditions or meetings (if one is desired, there is a $100 fee payable a the time of performance).
Thank you for letting me vent.
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REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |
Date Jan. 21 2005 17:37:55
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Jamey
Posts: 187
Joined: Jul. 7 2004
From: Winnipeg, Canada
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RE: Rule 1: No auditions or "m... (in reply to Miguel de Maria)
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Mike, just say "we've already booked. If you wanted me to first do an audition, then you should have brought that up prior to hiring me". Then just leave it at that.
Clients that want to "try before they buy" aren't clients by definition.
It would be a good habit to get an initial non-refundable retainer upon being commisioned. This is essentially how other artists (portrait painters, composers, etc.) normally get paid. If this "client" had already offered up an initial retainer (basically to ensure that they have "booked" you), then the meeting would not be an audition. Best yet, don't bring a guitar to this meeting. A meeting and an audition are not the same thing. To press the issue, get them to admit that they want you do bring your guitar. If they do, then you tell them that they'll have to make an additional booking for a private performance.
End of story.
If they agree to it, more money for you (not too many consultants do free consultations), if not, then you know exactly what they're all about and you've saved yourself the grief that comes with people that you'd rather see go elsewhere. Value your own time and worth.
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REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |
Date Jan. 21 2005 18:45:29
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Mark2
Posts: 1871
Joined: Jul. 12 2004
From: San Francisco
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RE: Rule 1: No auditions or "m... (in reply to Miguel de Maria)
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Fasinating stuff Mike, but all part of the game as you realize. Caterers do in fact have to audition sometimes for a wedding gig, by delivering samples of their vittles. I have been asked a number of times to go to a wedding rehearsal(which I charge for) or simply meet or talk to the bride and groom. My favorite was a guy who wanted music only during the bridal march and maybe ten minutes before it. He went out and listened to every flamenco player in town, some with much better technique than I. A few had clocked serious time in Spain playing for famous singers. He wanted to hear me play. I said come on over my house. When he arrived I played parts of a few pieces so he could decide what he wanted. He asked how much and I said $700.00 for the 15 minutes. He said that was much more than any one else wanted. I said the music was free. Here you are, I said, in my house and I'm playing for you for free. The $700.00 is for me to show up that day on time, properly dressed, with the right amp, and play this just right. It's for me to give up that weekend with my family. He wrote the check right there. Another time, a client wanted a rumba band with a flamenco singer. No problem, except they wanted to hear and see the singer. They already had a CD of the band(instrumental), which I had fed exed to canada at my expense. Well, most non spanish flamenco singers do not record for obvious reasons. This lady was attractive and gigged all over the area with various flamencos. I e-mailed the picture of her, but they still weren't convinced. I said "What is the concern?" The guy said he was concerned she might be a bad singer and the client would be embarassed. #@$%,%^!! My agent was on the conference call and got flabergasted. The gig didn't happen. Some people will take your guts out if you let them. But the wonderful thing is, it's your business and you get to make the rules. You could make a rule that you never sub out a gig unless you have a signed contract for a better one. My business partner and I agree that when we break our rules we usually get screwed. Get the contract signed and then say you have another gig during the "audition" And your right, you should not have to audition for gigs like that. But your in business, and you have to decide what you'll do and what you won't. I really love hearing about your gigs, Mike, because I used to do a lot of the kind of stuff your doing. It's nice to know I wasn't alone. I like what Jamey said about them not really being clients. He's right, until you've done work for them they are "potential clients" Funny what you said about the restaurant owner. A cab driver once told me he doesn't let traffic conditions dictate how he drives. Adapted that one myself :-)
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REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |
Date Jan. 21 2005 21:46:25
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Mark2
Posts: 1871
Joined: Jul. 12 2004
From: San Francisco
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RE: Rule 1: No auditions or "m... (in reply to Jon Boyes)
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I use an accountant too, and one year I was audited by the IRS. My accountant said one of the deductions I took ($150.00 for nail care) was being disputed. Even my accountant couldn't understand and suggested I forget about it. I wrote a letter explaining what it for and it was allowed. Another thing to keep track of is miles driven to and from every gig, and well as miles driven to buy strings, to take lessons, etc. All deductable, but you need to prove it. Record the location of every gig, and with mapping sofware, determine the distance.
A dancer I know deducts her trips to Spain. Of course tickets to concerts are deductable, as are recordings purchased, if they are business related. Video's, fax machines, phone bills-all potential deductions. And then there's recording equiptment. Just make sure you make a CD, even if it's just a demo to get gigs. Make sure you show a profit every few years at the least, or they will classify your music as a hobby and then it's goodbye all deductions and hello huge tax bill. I look at where I'm at in December, and decide if I'm getting stuff before the year's out. Did about 25 gigs last year and will show profit on the return.
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REPORT THIS POST AS INAPPROPRIATE |
Date Jan. 25 2005 17:10:17
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Remarkable how close that is, eh?